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Personal Post - Why I'm Unhappy With the Way I Look

This is a very hard post for me to write.  I want every woman to feel amazing in their skin and their clothes and as a personal stylist, it's my job to do just that.  It doesn't matter whether you're a 6ft tall Amazonian beauty or a curvy pocket rocket, there's an outfit (actually there are lots!) out there to make you look and feel like a superstar.

BUT, and it's a big but (pun intended), I've put on quite a lot of weight recently.  You don't need to know the actual figure, but it's enough to make me feel unfit and not really enjoy my clothes anymore.  I don't want to buy a(nother) bigger size, I want to get back to where I was a couple of years ago.  As a personal stylist, it's hard to admit that I don't think I look great, but there you have it.

I subscribe to the theory that you should dress for the body that you have NOT the body that you aspire to have.  This means you probably haven't noticed that I've piled on the pounds (unless you know me in real life, then I'm sure you have!).  I would never post unflattering photos of myself on the blog or instagram - who would?  Every photo that any blogger/stylist/whatever puts onto social media is carefully curated to ensure it portrays the right image.

That does not mean to say that I tamper with my pics, nope, no way.  They might be lightened or brightened, but there's no photoshopping going on - what you see is what I am, albeit in the most flattering pose!

BUT, when all is said and done, I am not happy with the way I look at the moment and it's time to do something about it.  The kicker for me was seeing a photo of myself in my gym wear and realising that my shape didn't look like "me" anymore - it looked like me after spending 6 months eating doughnuts.

Putting all the negativity aside, I have a plan.  I have a GREAT plan to get back into shape and lose the weight that I've put on.

I recently joined a fabulous gym (used to be a complete gym bunny, but lost my mojo somewhere a couple of years back) and have been working out with a friend who REALLY knows her way around a set of dumbbells.  Working out is great therapy and you feel such a great rush after you've spent an hour lifting weights and dicking around with straps and elastic bands.  So the first stage of my transformation is to get some serious gym time under my belt.  I've been dropping the kids to school and going to the gym straight away - done, dusted, then the rest of the day is mine.

Of course, as the saying goes, you can't out train a bad diet, and really this is where it all begins with me.

My eating habits have been shocking over the past couple of years and my weight is a reflection of this.  I wish I could say that it's hormonal, or hereditary or something, but I need to be brutally honest with myself and admit that it's because I've got into bad habits.  I'm not going to go into detail (if I start talking about chocolate cake, I'll start fantasising about it, and that's a BAD THING for me).

The upshot of this highly personal post is that I've overhauled my diet in a massive way, with the help of a naturopath and some strategically chosen supplements.

I only changed my way of eating a week or so ago, so it's VERY early days, but I can tell you that I'm already starting to drop a few kgs, and I have a lot more energy.

I promise that I won't bombard you with fit-pics or photos of me in the gym (boring!) but I will check back in in a couple of weeks and let you know exactly how I've been getting on and how much weight I've lost.  I'll also share with you the supplement I've been taking as it is key to getting the results that I've been seeing to date.

I hope you'll stay with me on my fitness journey - and share your stories too.  I'd love to know if you're struggling with your weight, or if you're on a get fit campaign, too.


  1. Good for you Vicki! Putting this kind of post out there for all the world to read is incredibly daunting, but being honest with your readers is so refreshing. By sharing your experience on your blog you’re keeping yourself accountable too which is only going to help with your fitness/health goals! I know I haven’t seen you in person for a while but good lighting and angles can only do so much, so don’t let yourself get too down about your body’s current state, you still look bloody fabulous to me (plus your new hair cut is perfecto!!) xxx Hannah

  2. Well done Vicki, I am a mum to a beautiful 4yr old, I was previously 108kgs and in the 2 years I've been working out I'm now down to 83kgs, it's tough to keep going and want to have some me time but it's totally worth it.
    Can't wait to see how you go, I know you will rock it!

  3. Thanks for this post, Vicki and all the best on your fitness journey. It's something I keep saying I need to do, then I go and have creamy pasta for dinner. I keep saying it will be easier once my daughter's a bit older . . .

  4. Know how you feel. I honestly think you wear and style the extra weight well. I on the other hand just look and feel more frumpy than normal. Looking forward to seeing how your endeavours go.

  5. It is hard to admit something as 'major' to us as this isnt it? I am glad for you, that you have made your choices to do what you want to do...not making a 'have to' is such an important thing. However, I would not want you to think you are not 'likeable' until you have 'lost weight' because...I KNOW body shape/weight can play havoc with our inner self-talk too. best wishes, Denyse

  6. I'm hearing you! I feel exactly the same way at the moment. It's not a lot of weight but its the bad habits that really need to be broken! Stick with it, you will feel great in no time. Bron x

  7. It's tough to admit when we put ourselves out there as beacons of inspiration to other women to love themselves the way we are. But when it's all said and done, we all go through times when we're not exactly pleased with what we see in the mirror and there's nothing wrong with that. You have a plan, you have goals and that's all you need to get back to where you want to be.


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