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What Will We Teach Our Boys?

Do you have a son?  Me too.  And I want him to grow up into the kind of man his daddy is.  Kind, honest, and a role model for his son, and his daughters too.

I want my son to know that it's ok to like girls and it's ok to find them attractive.  

I want my daughters to grow up being able to wear whatever they want and not be judged or vilified by anyone (ANYONE) for what they choose to wear.  Once we start telling our little girls that their tops show too much skin, or that their shorts are too short, we are sexualising them.  No-one tells a man that his top is too tight and distracting to women, or that his neckline is too low and we're all swooning in a Diet Coke style moment over his chest hair.

I want my girls to know that they can make their own choices about their outfits and the only way we can do this is by teaching our boys that girls don't wear clothes for them.  They don't dress to please boys, or to show boys how attractive they are.  They wear clothes that make them feel good, and look good and that's all. THAT'S ALL.

Let girls be girls and let boys grow up into the kind of men that we want to date our daughters, and that we want for a son in law.

Treating a girl with respect shouldn't be something that has to be taught, should it?  We teach our children to respect their elders and respect their teachers and, ultimately, respect themselves.  So why does it seem alien to teach boys to respect girls?  I think boys get a rough ride nowadays with so many aggressively masculine messages thrown at them.  It's hard to let them just grow up and be themselves.  They're expected to not cry, to be a man, to take control, all of the things that take aware the power from them to just be their own person.

I'm trying hard to let my son find his own path.  It's not easy and as a parent we have to take some responsibility for the kind of person our children grow up to be.  

It's going to be very hot in Australia, very soon.  Girls will be in bikinis and short shorts and so the hell what?  if I had legs that went on for ever, I'd be cracking out my Daisy Dukes at the first sign of summer.  Girls have the right to be who they want, just like boys do.

I want my son to know that I will love him until the end of time itself, and my daughters too, and I will do my utmost to make sure they are treated equally by me and by everyone around them.

Today is White Ribbon Day - a male-led campaign for ending violence against women.  It began in Canada and reached Australia in 2003.  You can support White Ribbon Day by using the hashtag #teachourboys and standing for the end of violence toward women.  There's a huge amount of information on their website, so please head over and spend a few minutes finding out what they do.



  1. Although I'm glad this issue is getting the attention it deserves, I'm sad that we have to have a white ribbon day in the first place!

  2. Thanks so much for writing about this issue. It's so sad that we need a day to acknowledge it. Thanks for your beautiful words. xx

  3. Nice photo :)
    Maria V.


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